Saturday, January 28, 2012

I'm just doin' me...

To say I've been a little obsessed with youtube videos lately would be an understatement.  I got sucked into "shit women say to personal trainers" and then it just spiraled out of control from there.  So my spare time I have been consumed by laughter and not paying much attention to blogger.  There I'm out now.  Actually, that's a load of crap.  I am in the middle of a relationship meltdown and have been zoning out with you tube instead of food.  Ok thats crap too...I have been pigging out so bad my band hurts.  Yes.      There ~ that's the truth.  I am soothing the pain and discomfort with food.  Arughggggh#$QW#$$$!!

So here's the whole truth ~ I have been running and feeling sassy and crushing on guys (did I mention I am married to a wonderful man?).  So I'm either feeling total rockstar~ ie full of myself and restricting calories and working that shit out ~ or I'm feeling alone and sad and feeding that hole with shit food.  The only saving grace is that the band does some damage control.  

I wish they talked more about this in the pre-op sessions about what life is like after the band when you wake up from the food coma and are all full of yourself looking at the grass on the other side of the fence.
So there ~ I'm out! 

The last time I worked out was Thursday ~ I don't know if you heard....but I ran really far.  :)  
Today work got in the way ~ how the hell do people balance that shit with a family?  Thank god I only have dogs....
Tonight I might run ~ or binge ~ or do both....sigh.  Last night I had mozzarella sticks for an app and mac n cheese for a main course...I could only get in two fork fulls but seriously ~ what tha FUDGE!

Tomorrow I have a baby shower to go to.  So not my scene ~ thank god someone told me not to bring liquor...instead I got her a gift card for a massage ~ registry shopping is so predictable ~ I might still bring her a good Barolo or some Champagne.  I'm going to try and start the 5 day pouch test and keep my shit clean for the party ~ just say  no to dip and anything that has melted cheese on it. 

So Ladies ~ that's the long and short of it.  Trying to do damage control and not fuck up my whole life.

Love that you guys are loosing and keeping me inspired ~ Hell yeah shout out to Robin, Miss Lorie and Cat!  You girls are Crushing it!!!  Here are some funny ass links to the videos that have been cracking me up ~ and yes, they are stereotype humor so no anonymous complaints ! I'm not PC and hope to never be.


  1. I have to go to a baby shower tomorrow too....ugh...I hate baby showers. I would rather just send the gift and say congrats. I do, however, love that cake at baby showers...but since I can't have it, just another reason to hate it.

  2. You know - you're not alone. MANY lap banders have relationship issues - MANY. It's just hard to blog about. But you are not alone.

  3. I have to go to a child's birthday party today... so I feel your pain. UGH.

  4. Love you, Vanessa. You have been in my thoughts. Changes are going to happen as you lose weight and take control of your life. You will not be perfect in all your choices, food and otherwise, but you are you and she is pretty great (in my opinion).