I got to thinking the other day while out on my long run. As one does. The difference a year can make. Not just in the scale or clothes, but in language. The language I use with friends and my inner dialogue. A year ago when I would use the word "half" it was usually a half of a bottle of wine, or half of a pizza. Now half means half marathon or I only had half of a slice of pizza or half of a sandwich or half of a pound loss.
"Time". I use to wonder if it was time to eat, or Time to open a bottle of wine, is it time for dessert? How much longer do I have to run..will this time pass quickly? Now time is something to Improve upon.
Speed ...didn't exist to me. Now I want it. I use phrases like "speed work" Splits and negative splits.. I want to be fast, I am thinking about speed more than "is my ass all jiggly when I run" "are people staring at the fat girl?". Now when I run I actually think about form..and performance...what ?
A year ago if you told me that I would make a plan with a friend that went like this: "wanna run in the morning?". "sure, 5 @ 8:30 ok?" "what pace?" I would have said what language are you speaking? This was my text from last night..and that is what I'm about to go do..run five miles in the trails with a friend. I used to meet friends for brunch and spend lots of TIME thinking about ording muffins or pancakes, I would eat with SPEED, and not PACE myself and I would worry that my jeans would SPLIT or the chair would not hold my weight. I would never eat just HALF of a bagle .. That would be crazy! So..that's the difference a year makes in language...and my inner voice no longer shouts You Are Fat and Lazy. It cheers me on to go faster and live! I am a lucky girl....what a relief to have shut that voice down. Words are powerful especially the ones you speak to yourself.
Speed ...didn't exist to me. Now I want it. I use phrases like "speed work" Splits and negative splits.. I want to be fast, I am thinking about speed more than "is my ass all jiggly when I run" "are people staring at the fat girl?". Now when I run I actually think about form..and performance...what ?
A year ago if you told me that I would make a plan with a friend that went like this: "wanna run in the morning?". "sure, 5 @ 8:30 ok?" "what pace?" I would have said what language are you speaking? This was my text from last night..and that is what I'm about to go do..run five miles in the trails with a friend. I used to meet friends for brunch and spend lots of TIME thinking about ording muffins or pancakes, I would eat with SPEED, and not PACE myself and I would worry that my jeans would SPLIT or the chair would not hold my weight. I would never eat just HALF of a bagle .. That would be crazy! So..that's the difference a year makes in language...and my inner voice no longer shouts You Are Fat and Lazy. It cheers me on to go faster and live! I am a lucky girl....what a relief to have shut that voice down. Words are powerful especially the ones you speak to yourself.
Listen to that voice Warrior sista, she knows what she's talkin about. In ten things Thursday you were asking for a mentor. I think YOU have become one. I absolutely adore you. Thank you for re-posting this.
ReplyDeleteLove this re-post. Good for you for looking inward to find your inspiration - I know you inspire me!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! It's very inspiring!
ReplyDeleteI love this post. Very inspiring. Thanks for "showing" us change!
ReplyDeleteSandra
Awesome post!
ReplyDelete