Summer officially ends Monday. So I've been beachin pretty hard...yesterday spent the whole day at the ocean. I'm heading there shortly for breakfast....
I've taken a few days off from the bike - had the chiropractor on Monday and have another adjustment this afternoon. I'm still in a lot of pain. So sitting on the beach and swimming it is.
Yesterday I got a text from a good friend - that was pretty snarky... I also work with this friend and for some reason, I couldn't let it go. It ate at me all day.
Its because I stood my ground and for once didn't drop everything in my world for that friend....which I usually do...for everyone all the time and particularly him. I stood my ground which isn't easy for me - ever.
But it still made me feel like I was in the wrong...
Feelings are frustrating and the more weight I carry the more feelings I have...
Sticking up for myself with people who I love and want badly to like me is something I need to work on.
Its all related....food, people pleasing, weight gain, self confidence....its like a cycle...I'm learning.. - very slowly.
ah man... this blog. did I write it? :-/ yesterday I learned something about myself dealing with these same things.... that there's a word for people like me- people pleasers who go above and beyond for others, which often leads to forgetting myself-codependence. it's an ugly word to me. but reading up on it made me realize it's accurate. ugh, I hate when it's true and I don't want it to be.
ReplyDeleteThe more weight I carry the more feeling I have. Me too. And the more those feelings seem overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteIt IS a cycle but good for you for recognizing what you can do for someone and what is just too much.
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, yes. I totally feel you. The more weight I have, the more insecure I get and the more I worry about every little thing like that. Hoping for your mojo to come back to you soon!
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