a Few things Friday

1.  I was in a funk since Wednesday.... Partly because I was so friggen sore from that class that I couldn't face moving let alone working out.

2.  A few of the things (work related) that I worked really hard to put together fell apart and one in particular felt like a kick to the gut. 

3.  This one two punch led to an unraveling in my head and a motivation fail.  I ended up calling it a day on Wednesday at 3:00 and took to bed.  Sometimes you have to wallow in self pity for a hot minute and then move on.

4. Yesterday - my mindset was "I don't wanna and I don't feel like it" - Resulting in violating my two rules - 1 being: go to the gym - it was cold as balls and I was sore and I didn't and the second rule:  Don't be dysfunctional with food - I binged on cereal... 

5. Today is a new day - I know that all of the drama comes from fear.  I'm scared of failing in business - particularly since all the financial pressure is on me.  I'm scared that I'm not good enough, I'm scared that I'll not be able to pay my bills now that I have bigger bills.  I'm scared that I'll not be able to stay focused on my health, I'm just plain scared and worried

6. Worry - aint nobody got time for that - its not helpful and I have to stop it and continue to push forward.

7.  So naturally a new phone cover with a sloth on it was the solution to my pain and worry.

8. Dog Fail ~ Thats a deer grazing in our yard.  And thats Ed ignoring it. 

 9.  Today ~ I will be proactive with work and eat lots of healthy food (see how I'm flipping that around ...saying eat LOTS of healthy food - instead of saying, I'll deprive myself of food I crave) 

10.  If it weren't for the struggle, life would be be really boring.